Scutaro NLCS MVP – OMG!

(Courtesy of “ThatHighlightChannel”):

That’s right – Marco Scutaro is the MVP of the 2012 National League Championship Series! Oh My God!

While the candidates were debating for the presidency on Monday night, Marco Scutaro was leaving no room for debate in the National League Championship Series. The Giants second baseman ran — and hit and fielded — unopposed for Most Valuable Player of the NLCS, crowning what had already appeared to be a foregone conclusion with a record sixth multihit performance in San Francisco’s 9-0 pennant-clinching Game 7 victory over the Cardinals at AT&T Park. As the 36-year-old previously obscure veteran exulted after every hit and flawlessly executed defensive play, his spirit soared far above his mile-high altitude as a member of the Rockies until the July 26 trade that brought him to his personal promised land. Scutaro’s 3-for-4 effort raised his toll to an LCS record-tying 14 hits as he batted .500 (14-for-28) in leading the G-Men’s charge back to the Fall Classic. The 14 hits tied the record for an LCS shared by the Yankees’ Hideki Matsui, St. Louis’ Albert Pujols and Boston’s Kevin Youkilis. Coming on the heels of a quintet of two-hit games, Scutaro’s six multihit games in the series set an LCS record, breaking the previous standard of five shared by five: Harold Baines in 1992, Devon White in 1993, Eddie Perez in 1999, Pujols in 2004 and Youkilis in 2007. Naming rights for the NLCS MVP Award are still available, and you could do worse than making it the Brian Sabean Award. Scutaro is the second straight midseason acquisition by the San Francisco GM to earn it for the Giants. In 2010, the hardware went to Cody Ross, whom the Giants had claimed on waivers from the Marlins in late August. Ross batted .350, with three home runs, in that October’s six-game victory over Philadelphia. By turning into Super Marco following Matt Holliday’s memorable slide into him early in Game 2 — the second baseman went 12-for-23 after that — Scutaro erased a lot of personal postseason frustration. His NLCS brilliance obscured the fact he had batted .150 (3-for-20) in the NL Division Series against the Cincinnati Reds. And in his only prior chance to play for an entry into the World Series, he had gone 1-for-15 (.067) in the 2006 ALCS as his A’s were swept by the Tigers.


Rumor-Scoot to Take Sox Helm

The persistent rumors that Bobby Valentine is on his way out as Red Sox manager reached fever pitch on Monday when none other than Marco Scutaro’s name surfaced as a possible replacement for the inventor of the wrap!

Why won’t these rumors go away, you may ask? Well, for one thing, look at he toll the Sox manager’s job has taken on Bobby V in just a few months:

Bobby V on Hiring Day

Bobby V on Hiring Day

Bobby V Now!

Bobby V Now!

This latest Bobby V replacement rumor was fueled by information this blog obtained from a reliable source inside the Sox organization. Our source learned that John Henry had ended his quest to buy the Colorado Rockies in return for getting the Rockies’ assurance that Scoot would be made available to the Sox IF AND ONLY IF Henry wanted Scutaro back to replace Valentine as Sox manager.

Our source went on to reveal that the plan would actually be for Scutaro to not only manage the Sox, but also be their starting shortstop!

Whether or not Henry goes thru with this move is apparently contingent on how the Sox do on their current road trip. If they come home with a losing record, our source says that Henry will pull the trigger!

This blog tried to reach John Henry for his comment on this latest Bobby V replacement rumor, but The Iroquois, Henry’s yacht, was already outside the 3 mile limit and was not accepting incoming calls. (This pattern of avoiding the press by setting sail on The Iroquois is a familiar dodge Henry has used in the past when big Sox news was about to break.)

The “Grey Goose” has flown the coop again! Looks like big news (Sox, NASCAR or Liverpool soccer) is about to break!

Stay tuned!


Rockies Love Scutaro’s Grit!

By Thomas Harding / | 03/08/12 9:52 PM EST

SCOTTSDALE, Ariz. — Rockies second baseman Marco Scutaro is usually the one who takes advantage of lapses.

Twice during his Major League career, once while playing for the Mets against the Rockies in 2003 and the other time while with the Red Sox against the Phillies in ’09, Scutaro drew a walk, but noticed the defense not paying attention, so he rounded first and took second base.

But Scutaro was shocked on Jan. 21. Hunting for deer and wild hogs on a friend’s farm “in the middle of nowhere” in his native Venezuela, and so far out of cellphone range that two days of rumors never reached him, he had no idea that the Rockies had acquired him in a trade with the Red Sox, for right-handed pitcher Clayton Mortensen.

Scutaro is a Rocky!

“The guys that work on the farm were watching a winter ballgame, and when I got off the farm one of them said, ‘Hey, congratulations,'” Scutaro said. “My wife had already given birth. He told me, ‘You got traded to Colorado, I don’t know.’ He told me innocently.”

By no means was the Rockies’ acquisition of Scutaro, 36, an off-hand proposition.

As the Red Sox’s primary shortstop last year, Scutaro hit a .299 with a .423 slugging percentage, the best such marks in his 10-season career with the Mets, Athletics, Blue Jays and Red Sox. Scutaro’s .358 on-base percentage was second-best of his career.

But what the Rockies felt they needed could not be found on a stat sheet. After going 73-89 last year, the Rockies needed Scutaro’s attention to detail, which not only shows up in the odd base-running play, but has manifested itself in a .992 career fielding percentage in 324 career games at second base.

The Rockies also loved Scutaro’s grit. The best example of that came in 2010, when he suffered a significant shoulder injury late in the year and moved to second base rather than sitting out. Hurting, he nonetheless reached safely in his final 16 games.

The Rockies already had budding star Troy Tulowitzki at shortstop. Now they have a fielder with above-average range and throwing at second.

“He adds a dimension at second base as one of those field-awareness guys that’s one step ahead of the action that’s taking place,” Rockies manager Jim Tracy said. “And this guy is absolute lightning turning the double play. The ball that’s thrown to him to start a 5- or a 6-4-3 double play, it’s interrupted. It doesn’t even look like it’s caught. It’s interrupted and it changes direction in order for it to start heading toward the first baseman.”

Scutaro also is expected to handle batting primarily second in the Rockies’ order, although it’s possible that Tracy could switch him and leadoff man Dexter Fowler on occasion. Scutaro hit toward the bottom of the Red Sox’s order last year.

“For me, it’s the same thing,” Scutaro said. “That’s how I made it to the big leagues. I’m not a power hitter and RBI guy. My game is to get on base, take the extra base, get into scoring position for the big guys and score runs.”


And on the The Iroquois, docked just outside the Rockies Spring Training Camp, we’re told by reliable sources that gentle sobbing could be heard coming from the captain’s cabin when this article was read over several appletinis!

Henry in Secret Bid to Buy Rockies

Frustrated John Henry at News Scoot Traded

Frustrated John Henry at News Scoot Traded

This blog has learned from reliable sources that Red Sox owner John W. Henry has entered into secret negotiations with Colorado Rockies senior management to buy that baseball franchise!

Why you ask? Simple. John Henry’s all-time favorite binky, Marco Scutaro, was traded to the Rockies last Fall without the “full” knowledge of his biggest fan, John W.!

How could that happen? Well, for openers, the deal was done and signed off by Henry on his yacht, the Iroquois. As we’ve learned the hard way over the last 6 months, decisions made on that infamous boat, especially decisions involving the Red Sox, have not been made with John W’s “full attention”. (To that point, we’ve learned that the crew of the Iroquois has affectionately nicknamed Henry “The Grey Goose” because of his edict that only Grey Goose vodka be used in his favorite on-board beverage, the appletini.)

So, in an effort to rectify what Henry has been heard to call “the all-time dumbest trade in baseball history”, he has decided to spend millions to get back his super star, Marco “Scoot” Scutaro!

Stay tuned for further updates as more details about this baseball bombshell get reported on this blog!

Henry Has Mishap in First NASCAR Race

Henry Escapes Unharmed

Where to begin?!

First, for those of you who didn’t know, Roush Fenway Racing won the Daytona 500! (John Henry is a 50% owner.)

From their Web site: “Roush Fenway Racing officially kicked off it’s 25th Anniversary season in grand fashion on Monday night, with Matt Kenseth holding off teammate Greg Biffle as the organization claimed its historic 300th NASCAR victory with its second Daytona 500 victory in the first ever night-time running of the famed event at Daytona International Speedway.”

But the back story is even more fascinating!

Sources have told this blog that about a month before the big race, Roush Fenway got a strange request from the big kahuna himself. John Henry told his NASCAR team to “order a driver’s suit that fits me”! Naturally the folks at Roush thought the eccentric one just wanted to watch the Daytona 500 in a racing jumpsuit from his yacht, the Iroquois. Boy were they wrong!

On race day, John W. showed up at the Roush team garage in his racing suit and declared, “I’m driving one of these cars in the race!” Holy bleep!

Long story short, Henry donned a racing helmet, got behind the wheel, fired up the  engine and “went racin’!” Only problem was Henry had never driven in a REAL race, let alone the Daytona 500!

Then we come to the most bizarre part – JWH was the driver who took out the track jet cleaner in spectacular fashion two-thirds of the way thru the race (see photo)!

NASCAR officials had been told of this bizarre turn of events (Henry driving in the race) by the Roush folks before the race began “just in case…” Good thing they knew!

When race officials saw Henry take out the jet cleaner, they sprung into action! They hastily got Henry out of the wreck and into an ambulance before anyone, even the fire fighters, knew who really had been at the wheel!

The next day, a bruised and embarrassed Henry wrote a check to the Daytona folks to cover the purchase of a new track jet cleaner and the repair of the partially destroyed track.

And John promised the Roush team that all of his future NASCAR exploits would be done from the poop deck of the Iroquois!

NASCAR protects its billion dollar owners in more ways than most fans ever realize!

And what does all of this have to do with Marco Scutaro?! It’s becoming more obvious every day – John Henry is a ship (or yacht) without a rudder when Scoot is not by his side!

Henry Heads for Spring Training – in Scottsdale!?

Wait a minute! The Red Sox do their spring training in Ft. Myers, FL. Why the heck are John Henry and his entourage headed for Scottsdale, AZ?!

Iroquois Heads for Scottsdale

Iroquois Heads for Scottsdale

Because that’s where the Colorado Rockies, and more importantly, Marco Scutaro, will do their spring training! Duh!

So instead of ordering the captain of his yacht, the Iroquois, to set a course for the Gulf and Ft. Myers, we have heard that John H. ordered the skipper to “get this boat to Scottsdale and pronto!”

As most of the western world knows, Scottsdale, AZ is landlocked, so the only choice the skipper and his crew had was to, unbeknownst to John, hoist the Iroquois onto a mega trailer and start down the Mass Pike to Arizona!

So today the Red Sox equipment van heads for Ft. Myers and John, wife “Judy” and the Iroquois head for Scottsdale!

Scoot Welcomed to Denver!

Only for Scutaro! A “Victory Parade” just for showing up!

Scoot Welcomed to Denver

Scoot Welcomed to Denver!

The streets of Denver were flooded with ecstatic Rockies fans last week to welcome Marco Scutaro to town! (This was of course before the February Blizzard buried Denver in 2 feet of snow!)

Denver Mayor Mike Hancock presented Scoot with the Keys to the City in a ceremony at City Hall. Then the festivities really began!

A parade from City Hall to Coors Field lasted over 2 hours – the photo above shows what Market Street looked like as the Scoot Parade went by.

Rockies fans were unanimous in their praise of Rockies GM Dan O’Dowd. “O’Dowd STOLE Scutaro from the Sox!”, one fan was heard to say. Another exclaimed, “This was the one key trade the Rockies had to make to get them back to the World Series!”

Naturally, Marco Scutaro took all of this in stride. Although he was thrilled by the welcome he received from Rockies fans, his thoughts flashed back to poor John Henry, alone again on his yacht in Boston Harbor with only his wife, Linda Pizzuti (affectionately known to Sox fans as “Judy Kazuti”) and his crew of 25 to keep him company.

With Scoot’s departure to Denver, it now appears that both the Sox front office and John Henry are lost at sea!

The Dream is DEAD!

Say it ain’t so, Ben!! Scoot to the Rockies for a Triple A pitcher so the Sox can then sign a 33 year old over the hill #4 starter?! You’re kidding!!

Scutaro_Gone From _Sox

Scutaro_Gone From _Sox

The splintered bat in this Scutaro photo is symbolic of the fact the Sox have dealt themselves and The Nation a mortal blow for the 2012 season.

And how could John Henry approve this trade?! Marco single handedly brought sanity to an insane ball club with his unbelievable play in the second half of the 2011 season. And rumor also has it that Scoot saved John’s life on several occasions during that awful Sox collapse when the Appletinis flowed a little too freely on Henry’s yacht and John had to be pulled out of Boston Harbor by none other than Scoot, Henry’s all but adopted son!

So instead of watching Scutaro have a Hall of Fame season at short stop, we now have another no-name at short and and a “DL Watch” for a washed up 8 million dollar man aka Roy Oswalt!

So long but not good bye, Marco Scutaro! The Sox have made another unbelievably bad personnel move and The Nation has lost a true giant!

Scoot-Date #1

As the name implies, these Marco Scutaro Updates (“Scoot-Dates”) will be issued from time to time to update his loyal followers on earlier Scoot exploits!

Ralph and Rowena Elf

Ralph and Rowena Elf

Xmas Update – Loyal Scoot Follower Fran is reporting that the REAL problem Santa ran into during his preparation for Xmas Day this year was that he imported South Pole elves to meet the elf-shortage (no pun intended) he ran into this Fall. Because of the historical animosity (hatred, really) that existed between North Pole and South Pole elves, Santa knew that importing South Pole elves would create a potential time bomb at the Village, but in his usual Ho, Ho, Ho style, Santa thought he could handle it!

Then Santa came down with the flu – that’s when all hell broke loose! Luckily, Scoot and Santa had worked together a number of years ago on a similar problem so, of course, St. Nick turned to Scoot to save Xmas Day!

As reported earlier, Scoot confronted Ralph, the Angriest Elf, about the North-South elf issue as well as Ralph’s anger at never getting a chance to drive one of the sleighs. (Yes, there’s more than one sleigh – how else could Santa get all those presents delivered in just one night?!)

Luckily Ralph, a native North Pole elf, though still angry, had taken a liking to Rowena, one of the South Pole elves. That blossoming relationship plus Scoot’s intervention helped cool the situation enough so that the toy building could get back on schedule.

Where would the world be without Marco Scutaro?! Not a pretty thought, is it!